Thursday, January 20, 2011

From the Wolf Den: How Do You Spell "Home"?

Our family therapy sessions with Wolf are definitely taking on a new format, now that the concept of "home" seems to be something we can mention without cringing, any of us. But what will "home" mean to our son, and really, the whole family?

After almost three years (we will have reached three years by the time Wolf does indeed make that flight from CHYC to Alaska), so much has changed. For those of us in Alaska, our physical home looks different, our physical selves, do, too. Wolf will not be coming back to this "home", but will be making a new adjustment at a group "home".

With all the kids in residential treatment out of state, there is not only the reconfiguration of family dynamics, but within the realm of convincing the brain that everything will not, as much as they want it, be the same as when they left. For better or worse, people and places and things have moved on. This is a hard concept for kids who thrive on sameness, and perhaps the one we are most concerned about.

Preparing for this is a prime directive for my visit in a few weeks. Nothing is the same, yet Wolf desperately aches for that familiarity of place and routine. Whew. Lots of work, ahead.

1 comment:

Natalie said...

That's a tough one. Is there any way to prep him...with photographs -an album he can flip through and familiarize himself with -and letting him ask all sorts of questions and make observations about "same and different" the way I would with my little kids but more framed in a more age and ability appropriate way? You're a lovely mom to care so much, it's been a moving experience to watch your continuing journey with your sons, and I'm so grateful your'e sharing it with us.