Roadblocks to success. The boulders, gates, whatever-you-want-to-call-them that prevent people from accomplishing something difficult. They exist in our minds as real as a barbed wire fence, and are just as painful to crawl through.
Power and Control over people or situations
Fear of our emotions
The innate Need to be Right
Wolf is standing today about two feet from that fence, and can't decide whether or not he wants to go through. As the folks who are waiting on the other side, Yukon and I are becoming a teensy bit impatient and frustrated with this pacing and posturing that doesn't get anybody anywhere. But then, it isn't about us.
Asperger Syndrome forces children to utilize unorthodox defense mechanisms as a measure of protection. Even the most benign teasing, to a child with AS, means confusion and a rush to defend themselves. Then, when other people begin to notice that he or she is easily set off by such comments, those roadblocks go up, and stay up. Having control over something, anything, even in a negative way means the AS kid can survive, however tenuous this may seem to the rest of us. Emotions are "useless" to someone with Asperger's; they get in the way because they are hard to manage. At least, according to Wolf.
There is the merest whisper of change in the air. Calls home are less about trivial things and more about status at school. Levels of anger are rising, at peers, at staff, at himself, leading us to believe that perhaps, just perhaps, the Ah-Ha is coming.
We can just pray that he carefully navigates that barbed wire instead of crashing through it.
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